I realise that other people hide their flaws in different ways. When you think of yourself, are you your flaw? When I think of myself, I constantly see feel my glasses falling down my nose so I guess I’m this guy:
To me what really makes a person beautiful is seeing their flaws, and their vulnerability. Mirroring those qualities back to a person that aren’t linked to what is seen in a mirror, is the formation of a true connection.
The standard “You’re fit”, will always mean less than: “I like how you fight for what you believe in” and “I like how you squeeze my hand when I’m sad”. Never settle for a connection based on something superficial, as it’s the deeper ones that will keep you fed for longer.
This legend Winnie Harlow has it down: “The real difference isn’t my skin. It’s the fact that I don’t find my beauty in the opinions of others”
Talking of superficial lets take a moment and play have you ever:
- Have you ever realised your fly is open after being out of the house for over an hour?
- Have you ever looked across at someone in a bar and thought “not even Scarlett Yohansson has got a chance”?
- Have you ever caught yourself saying “You’re an idiot” to yourself?
- Have you ever had a peaceful moment (mine are all out in the park/lakes) and realised none of this matters we’re all human and we’re all the same?
What I take from this is that: We are all trying to become someone else to achieve something (usually acceptance in one form or another). However “Each time we fail to become authentically like someone we perceive as better than us, we become more like our authentic selves”. (TED – Who am I) We should always strive to be our authentic selves even though that isn’t what we were hoping in the first place.
Another point I wanted to highlight from the above is; if someone said to your best friend that they were “useless”, “ugly” and “no one wanted to speak to them” you would correct them (well I hope so!). So why do we tell ourselves these things? If we aren’t willing for it to be said to our friends? We are stuck in a loop of being so self critical, that we don’t actually realise that the person we are is actually pretty great.
Do not adjust yourself, you’re just fine.