I tell my friends this quote all the time:
Unfortunately there isn’t enough time to psycho analyse me, so we’ll just stick to the blog. Whether your last relationship ended because “you refused to be mine, but you made me yours” (Lena Dunham).
Or for some other reason…
We are all in this together. To illustrate this Helen Fisher asked two questions:
- “Have you ever been rejected by someone who you really loved?
- Have you ever dumped someone who really loved you?”
95% of college students answered: “Yes”
Clearly this effects a lot more of us than we may realise. Researchers in the State of Columbia University scanned peoples brains after unwanted break ups. They looked at physical, as well as the obvious emotional effects. The areas in their brain lit up similar to having a hot probe on their arm when shown pictures of their ex partners.
“These findings are consistent with the idea that the experience of social rejection, or social loss more generally, may represent a distinct emotional experience that is uniquely associated with physical pain,” Ethan Kross, an associate professor at University of Michigan told University of Michigan News in 2011.
Through all of this I really haven’t become a cynic (I promise). I will always fight for a relationship that I believe in. However, sometimes I am given some pain in a neatly wrapped bow. I go and hang out with the ones that make me smile (and forget about Geoff), in a little while I’ll be just fine. You will too (if not my door is always open)